I am a fool. I can say a lot to sound wise, and people can tell me I articulate my thoughts well, but at my very core I am a fool. I am quick to speak, quick to assume, and slow to admit my errors. Pride makes it difficult to see when we are in need of correction. Sometimes it takes the lovingly harsh rebuke from others to finally realize things we must repent and turn from. But there is a way to keep tabs on ourselves as well, and that is through self-reflection. “Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test?” 2 Corinthians 13:5 “Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.” Lamentations 3:40 In a world where it is common to run on autopilot, it is no strange thing to regret our thoughts, words, and deeds. We are hardwired to act on impulse, and it seems strange to fight our impulses rather than letting them take the lead. What we need to understand, though, is that we are by nature sinful and so it is actually necessary to battle our impulses. It is difficult to sit in silence when you are itching to speak up, but have you consulted the Spirit? If you haven’t, and He doesn’t want you to speak, then you’ll probably regret what you say. We end up regretting everything we do out of step with the Spirit. I have never self-reflected before. In fact, this morning was my first time. But in my time of self-reflection I was able to come up with quite a list of things I had done wrong just yesterday. Rude comments, assumptions, prideful arguments, etc. All within the course of one day. Sure, I started that day the same as any other—with Bible reading and prayer—but a hearty breakfast won’t keep you from the pangs of hunger that will come later in the day. “Indeed, if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.” Proverbs 2:3-5 How can a person be wise? By fearing the Lord. We’ve discussed this before. So then, how can a person learn to fear the Lord? By searching for insight and understanding as if digging for gold. But as we learned in a previous post about Job, wisdom cannot be found anywhere on the earth, so what does that search for wisdom look like? “Repent at my [wisdom’s] rebuke! Then I will pour out my thoughts to you, I will make known to you my teachings.” Proverbs 1:23 It all comes down to repentance. And you can’t repent if you don’t know you’re sinning, and you can’t know you’re sinning if you aren’t self-reflecting--examining your ways and testing yourself against the Scriptures to find where your thoughts, words, and deeds do not line up. So what does self-reflection look like? If you’ve never done it before then you can use the template a friend gave me which was very effective for me this morning. Basically, you spend some time each morning (or evening) going through everything that you thought, said, and did the day before and you ask yourself these questions:
If it is helpful to you, here is an example of some of my reflections from this morning about things I did yesterday:
The idea of these self-reflections is not to self-hate. It is a way to examine your actions and realign them with what is said in the Scriptures. It gives you the opportunity to dig deep into yourself and figure out why you are not acting as the Scriptures say you should so that you can repent and pray God will give you the wisdom and understanding to not repeat the same mistakes. And by finding biblical evidence that supports or refutes your own actions, you strengthen your biblical knowledge and accumulate references for if you or someone else experiences a similar situation in the future. These reflections should move you to action. "The complacency [uncritical satisfaction with oneself or one’s achievements] of fools will destroy them” Proverbs 1:32b. Don’t become complacent. Test and examine yourself daily. Ask God for wisdom. I cannot stress how important a practice like self-reflection is, and I’ve only just begun doing it today. We are by nature sinful, so there will always be something for us to reflect on, repent of, and ask God for help with. Don’t ever assume you’re doing everything right. “You must ask for God’s help. Even when you have done so, it may seem to you for a long time that no help, or less help than you need, is being given. Never mind. After each failure, ask forgiveness, pick yourself up, and try again. Very often what God first helps us towards is not the virtue itself but just this power of always trying again. For however important chastity (or courage, or truthfulness, or any other virtue) may be, this process trains us in habits of the soul which are more important still. It cures our illusions about ourselves and teaches us to depend on God. We learn, on the one hand, that we cannot trust ourselves even in our best moments, and, on the other, that we need not despair even in our worst, for our failures are forgiven.
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AuthorFighting complacency and advocating change in myself for the world around me. Posts by Date
February 2019
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